Saturday, 22 February 2014

My Heart...

My heart has been incomplete since 5th January 2005. That was the day that I lost my best friend, my Mom. Some of you may not have the slightest interest, but this is my blog and I don't just want it to be 'I love this lipstick' or 'I hate this eyeshadow', I want it to be personal. My Mom is still a massive part of my life and I don't feel that someone truly knows me until they hear a little bit about her. If it doesn't interest you then click off and wait for my next post :)

She was a single Mother/Superwoman. Raising my sister and I was not an easy task, we fought pretty much 24/7. She never showed any sign of struggle. She was the type of person that literally everyone loved, she was everyone's friend. If anyone had a problem, they would go to her, she just had a way of making people feel better. She was spontaneous, loving and inspiring. Unfortunately she suffered with cancer for quite a few year before she surrendered her battle. Caring for my Mom at such a young age was exhausting and heart breaking, but I wouldn't have had it any other way. She had taken such good care of me in my life, how could I not have returned the favour? Up until the very end I never heard her complain, that is a sign of true strength in my opinion. 

Do I think about her every second of every day? No, because life goes on. However I will see or hear something that reminds me of her and my heart sinks. I sometimes worry that I will forget what she sounded like, but then I realise that doesn't matter. What matters is that I remember the unconditional and overwhelming love that she had for me. Memories last a lifetime. 

I can only hope that I become half the woman's that she was. Her passing left many in devastation, it's comforts me knowing that she lives on in their hearts. 

Sorry for the downer post, that was not my intention at all. I don't want anyone's pity or attention. I just want to be honest.

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